Negotiations

As I'm sure you know, the Big Talk in Washington and among the pundits these days is all about Torture - how to, when to, where to, and who to do it to.

Now, the US Army will tell you that torture doesn't get you any information worth having, and after a while it becomes self-defeating. And there are several Federal laws that bind us to international treaties that, simply put, say "Thou shalt not torture."

But the Bush Administration wants to torture people for information, citing the fantasy world scenario of the ticking clock: If you KNOW, beyond all doubt, that A has crucial data that could stop a bomb from going off in 24 hours, how far will you go to get A to give up that data?

The current talk and negotiations between the Rubber-Stamp Congress and the Dear Leader about torture remind me of this classic scenario:

Say A comes up to B and asks, "If I asked you to perform oral sex on a man for ten dollars, would you do it?"
"No," B replies.
"How about a million dollars?" A asks.
"Hmm. Okay," B says.
What we've just done is establish that B is a whore, with an upper limit on how much money it will take to induce him to perform oral sex on A. Now that the upper and lower limits have been set, negotiations can begin.

Kind of like with the torture negotiations. The President has set the limits, and is now discussing exactly how much it'll take for the Congress to get down on their knees to him again.

Just like your common garden variety grade Z crack whore.