(SFX: Teletype chattering)
And now, the latest from the asylum that is Modern American Politics. Poekhali!
The new GOP majorities in both houses of the Congress anticipated doing Great Things.
Things like repealing Obamacare, Social Security, Medicare, and the President's executive action on immigration.
Things like declaring war in all directions. Bang!
(Hmm, not a sausage. Hardly worth the journey.)
So far, what have they done?
Well, they passed a bill denying Federal funding for abortion (which has been illegal since the 1980s, but they have no sense of history).
They voted to repeal Obamacare - for the 56th time. So far, the effort to destroy Obama's signature domestic legislation has cost about $70 million in OUR money, to no result at all. They're now relying on their hirelings in the Supreme Court to defeat key portions of it, but the legal position is rather shaky despite the horde of lawyers who have been unleashed.
Social Security requires just a tiny tweak to remain solvent until I'm old(er) and gray(er), but the GOP's been trying to kill it with fire since it was passed back in the Thirties. Way to be humane about the elderly.
In the meanwhile, we've been treated to a wonderful smorgasbord of Stupid, garnished with Hurt Fee-fees.
The Stupid is twofold - the ignorant ravings of criminal lunatics about vaccination against childhood diseases, and the willful ignorance regarding the actual history of Christianity's dealings with people they don't like.
The anti-vaccination yahoos found aid and comfort from such Republican luminaries as Rand Paul and Chris Christie. See what I meant about criminal lunatics? With Aqua Buddha and The Zeppelin on their side, they must feel really secure in their frankly insane position.
And sorry Fox 'news' and all the other fatheaded legions of Dumb out there - yes, Christians have, in fact, perpetrated atrocities over their long history. The Crusades (in the Fourth, a Christian town was sacked, as was the capital of Christian Byzantine Empire), the Inquisition, anti-Semitic pogroms, Southern US lynchings, Christian justifications for slavery, Jim Crow and the KKK, Christians blowing up Christians in Northern Ireland, and the modern US 'Christian Identity' movement. I won't go on, as I'll get bored and run out of room.
Hurt fee-fees? Oh, the butt-hurt was thick on the ground when Rep. Alcee Hastings (D-FL) called Texas "crazy" at a Congressional hearing. Now, I live in Flori-DUH, and any Flori-DUH politician who calls another state crazy deserves a hearty helping of Pot-calling-Kettle-black.
However, you have to give Hastings some credit for spine - when the Texans demanded he apologize, Hastings brought up an old Texas regulating dildo possession as an example the Crazy in the Lone Star State. The present Governor in Austin, in fact, defended that law back when he was Attorney General.
Texans believe in little or no regulation of deadly weapons, but believe in regulating friendly weapons, it seems.
And that's the latest from The Asylum.
(SFX: Teletype chattering eclipsed by shotgun blast; explosion; bits of metal raining down)