Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Early Holiday Depression Episode

A lot of people get depressed over the holidays, and I am no exception. I just try to get it over with early, so I can enjoy my heavily spiked egg nog in relative peace.

Luckily, a series of news items have helped jump-start my depression.

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The school board of Polk County, Florida is staking out a new claim as the Stupidest Bunch of People in the Whole Fucking State. A majority of the board are supporters of the creationist "intelligent design" explanation of everything, and they seem to live in a world where the 2005 Kitzmiller decision never happened. Two speakers from a science advocacy group spoke to the board, as did an 8th grade teacher who supports ID. The board ignored the two advocates, prompting one to ask rhetorically, "Do these people want a million-dollar lawsuit?"

Apparently so.

***

The United States military lured a lot of young people into volunteering for service by offering them signing bonuses of up to $30,000. Now some of those soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines are being asked to give that money back because they didn't serve out the full term of their contract.

It's not their fault they couldn't complete their commitments; they were sent back home minus legs, arms, eyes and other parts. But the military wants the money back (I guess so they can offer it to the next crop of kids who want money in exchange for the possibility of getting their parts shot off).

***

Former Bush Press Secretary Scott McClellan has admitted that he knowingly lied to the press and the American people by feeding them deliberately false information at the behest of his masters in the White House and the Office of the Vice President.

And this is news - how!?

Ever since Ron Ziegler, the American people have always known that the Press Secretary to the President is a lying mouthpiece, a sock puppet, a ventriloquist's dummy who only repeats what the guys in the front office tell him to say. Everyone knew that Tony Snow was a lying fuck; why is it a big surprise that Scotty-Dog's revealed to be one as well?

***

On the up side, I have my cooking schedule set down (I only have to bring a side dish and a dessert to the dinner tomorrow), and I'm off on Friday so I can work off some of Thanksgiving dinner by doing honest proletarian labor in my garden (it's a trifle overgrown).

1 Comments:

Anonymous Kevin Hayden said...

Clearly, you just need the Turkey Force to be with you.

Enjoy, Walt.

8:01 PM EST  

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