Thursday, May 19, 2011

Consolidated Morons, Dimwits and Fools

In other words, the Republican Party Presidential Candidates, Class of 2012.

If you put all of them together in one place at the same time, the combined weight of stupidity would cause them all to collapse in on themselves, compressing into a tiny cretinous singularity.

Newt Gingrich is probably wishing he stayed in bed rather than declare himself a candidate. On Bullshit the Press he opened his gaping piehole and said that he didn't support the Paul Ryan 'Path to Poverty' that would have gutted Medicare and replaced it with a voucher program that would not pay enough to cover medical costs. This would have the attractive benefit of slowly exterminating the same senior citizens who propelled Ryan and the Teabaggers into a House majority.

Fortunately people are waking up to it, and the yelling has started.

Gingrich has backpedaled, "folding like a cheap Democrat" as one lefty blogger remarked, and has vociferously denied he ever said that - to the point that he actually declared that if anyone quotes anything he said at that BStP airing is guilty of 'falsehood.' He also attacked the show's moderator, Dick Gregory, saying that he - poor, innocent babe-in-the-political-woods Newtie - was unprepared for Gregory's 'gotcha' questions.

Another person who inveighed against 'gotcha' questions, Sarah Palin, jumped to Newt's defense. She stated that Gregory was racist, apparently for repeating Gingrich's stupid assertion that Obama was a 'food stamp President.' The half-term Governor needs to feel as if she's still relevant, I guess.

Newt thought that his time had come, but sadly no. He's trying to run a 1994 campaign for 2012, and the Tea Party - who have seized the throat of the GOP and are worrying it like a terrier with a sock puppet - are not kind to heretics. Donors are fleeing Gingrich in a big way, so I don't give him much longer.

Former Senator Frothy Mixture Santorum had the gall to say that Senator Angry John McCain has no idea of what torture is. McCain, who was tortured for five years as a guest of the North Vietnamese government, let his aides handle his light work. One referred to Santorum as an idiot, I think - it might be a bit outre to refer him as a 'shit stain.'

Donald Trump is out as a candidate, which is a good thing. He had less gravitas than Ross Perot, but better hair.

The GOP is almost desperately casting about for a viable candidate, and some pundits think it could come down to Tim Pawlenty and Mitch Daniels. I've already discussed Pawlenty, and dismissed him as colorless (but he does seem to hire well - a number of his aides have criminal records), and all Daniels has going for him is he was GW Bush's budget director. You know, the guy who turned a $5 trillion surplus into a $5 trillion deficit in record time.

So things ought to be fun - at least, fun to watch.

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