Some Post-Election Ruminations

Quo Vadis? . . . Best Electoral Tagline . . . GOP Pundits and Assorted Hangers-On Start Asking, "What the hell just happened?" . . . John Boehner, GOP Bourbon . . . A Childhood Treasury of People Who Should SFTU . . . Stay Classy, Mitt . . .

Which way now for the new/old Obama Administration?

Well, let's start with:  PARTY!  PARTY!  PARTY!

Then, it's time to get serious, as the nation has serious problems, beginning with the economy, and the fact that the Budget Control Act is going to trigger on New Year's Day.  While the full impact of it won't be felt until late in 2013, it's a Laputa-esque bladder to the face to remind everyone that we still haven't managed a budget up in Washington.  This is, in great part, due to the intransigence of the Republican caucus who wanted to dig in and do whatever it took to make Obama a one-term President.

Which didn't happen, and they have to actually contemplate the C Word ("compromise") now.  Taxes will have to be raised, as any high school math student will be able to tell the GOP House caucus that you have to balance BOTH sides of an equation in order to get it to work.

Making sure that Social Security and Medicare remain inviolate and robust are the next priority.  Social Security will be solvent again by a simple revision of the tax code to eliminate the payroll cap.

Foreign policy, climate policy, immigration . . . it's a fat In Box waiting for action, and it's not going away.

***

Best summary of the election, ever:
 

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The GOP, the Grand Old Party, God's Own Party, reeled like a man getting mugged in a meadow back on Tuesday night.  Throughout the land, there was great consternation and a public meltdown on Fox as Karl Rove went batshit insane.

And now, in the cold light of a looming second Obama Administration, the Party leadership, the membership and the pundits are all asking, "What the Hell just happened?  Why, according to OUR numbers - "

That's just it.

YOU "unskewed" the polls, making it appear that Romney had a chance of winning.  Unfortunately, your "unskewing" was like a guy cooking the books - things will not stand up to reality when crunch time comes.  Cooking the books gets you audited.  Cooking the polls will make you a loser.

The Party's Department of What the Hell Happened? is currently running about in Chicken Little mode, blaming everyone and everything from Hurricane Sandy to some kind of Harry Potter-type magic.  It won't work, folks.  Reality states that the Republicans didn't exactly endear themselves to wide swaths of the electorate - women, blacks, Hispanics, gays, non-evangelicals, even Mormons (Bush won 80% of the Mormon vote in 2004; Romney carried only 78%), and those chickens would come home to roost sometime.

So the butthurt is immense as the GOP, faced with the awful realization that their worldview and their positions have been repudiated - again - are left wandering about and saying distractedly:

Who knew Derpy Hooves was Republican?

***

John Boehner (R-You Lonesome Tonight?) embraced the Romney Tax Plan, smoke, mirrors and all, and pledged to cooperate with President-elect Romney in implementing . . .

Oh, yeah.

That's right.

Romney lost, didn't he?

But try telling Those Cryin' Eyes that.  Boehner said that tax hikes on the wealthiest Americans would not be happening, while the President, having gotten the endorsement of the American people for his tax plans, says otherwise.

And the looming "fiscal cliff" isn't waiting.  As I said above, Boehner apparently failed high school math, and refuses to face reality - you have to balance the equation.  If you cut  spending, you must also raise revenue in order to balance the books.  Johnny-Mop isn't understanding this, and neither is his diminished caucus.

It's up to the Democrats and the President to disabuse him of that notion, and do everything possible to drive the narrative that the Boner is a Bourbon - he forgets nothing, but learns nothing.

***

Complete Asshole Allan West of Florida (R, of course) is dead set on suing to retain his seat in the House.  Florida law, however, is a bar to his ambitions, as the statute says that the margin must be 0.5% to trigger an automatic recount.

Patrick Murphy, West's Democratic challenger, currently leads with 0.7% percent.  One judge has already slapped West down, saying in his ruling that the election hasn't been certified yet.  Any suits now would be premature.

But try telling West that. 

An eighteen-year-old Georgia girl tweeted that she was going to move to Australia, because - as she put it - "their President is a Christian."

Australians tweeted back at her, and laid down a few facts:  Australia has a Prime Minister, who is currently a woman and an atheist who lives with her unmarried partner.  The sarcasm grew so thick that the girl deleted her Twitter account, which proves that you really should know a bit about what you're wasting 140 characters on.

Aging Rocker and Machine Gun Fellator Ted Nugent said back in April that he would be either dead or in jail if Obama got re-elected.  Well, that happened four days ago, and the countdown to April 2013 is on, Teddy. 

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Finally, in our Unkindest Cut of All Department, the Secret Service protection on the Romney and Ryan families disappeared while they slept, and Mitt shut off his staff's credit cards without warning.  Stay classy, Mitt my boy.