Saturday, February 08, 2014

On a Mission from God to Destroy the GOP

All alone in his unquiet grave on the banks of the River Styx (he was too cheap to pay Charon for the ride), Lee Atwater looks up, his flesh crawling with maggots, and says, "Oh, not again . . . "

Atwater, the guitar-playing, blues-singing racist motherfucker who established Reagan's "state's rights" strategy that once and for all lured the Dixiecrats and unreconstructed Confederates into the Party of Lincoln and Eisenhower, shakes his moldering fist at the TV screen.  Yes, dear readers, there is TV in Hell - but all it shows is Fox News Opposite.

Because Satan has to be that way.  Hush now.

Fox News Opposite is what it says it is - the opposite of the Fox 'News' we all know and loathe.  Programming is chosen by the Dark Lord of Evil himself, and can be pretty eclectic - gluttons are shown cooking shows, etc. - so it's no surprise that Lee Atwater is shown yet another example of the Republican Party marginalizing itself for the common good.

Despite taking a massive demographic drubbing in the 2008 and 2012 elections, the GOP hasn't really managed to woo any significant percentages of women, minorities or young people away from the Independents or the Democrats.  Oh, they talked big, of course, but every time they said they were making the tent bigger, they managed to say or do something to further alienate the groups that the Republicans must have in order to prevent themselves from becoming a Lunatic Fringe Regional Party.

One faction within the Party is the Log Cabin Republicans, made up of homosexuals.  If I may be pardoned the indelicacy, these must be the most self-hating bunch of idiots on the soiled face of the Earth.  When you consider the anti-gay agenda the Republican Party has clung to for the past decades, you have to wonder just what the blazes these men and women are doing there.  Maybe they have cookies.


A candidate for vice-chair of the Michigan GOP, one Ms. Mary Helen Sears, posted a blog entry last April calling for the Party to "purge" The Gay from their ranks.  She went on to say that "Satan uses homosexuality to attack the living space of the Holy Spirit," which strikes me as rather amusing.  I mean, the Holy Spirit's supposed to be an emanation, a disembodied power - it doesn't need living space.  And Satan has other tools in his cabinet that are far more subtle, like self-righteousness.

Interestingly, this stance, which is held by quite a few Party apparatchiks on the local and state levels, has the "Establishment" wing of the Party reaching for the Pepto-Bismol and the antidepressants.  They're working to sabotage Sears' candidacy by backing their own safe candidates, even to the point of asking one to quit so they won't split the ticket and get Sears into the Party hierarchy (Party rules in Michigan require that it be a woman, which will beg another question).

So Lee Atwater actually sighs in relief as the channel changes itself to an endless loop of gay porn, because it means it's time for his daily massage.  To a douchebag like Atwater, being beaten with flaming steel rods for eternity seems like a gentle hot oil rub compared to watching the Party he sold his soul for self-destruct.


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